The Bryant family is enduring a truly heartbreaking time with the passing of Joe “Jellybean” Bryant, father of the late NBA legend Kobe Bryant and a respected basketball player in his own right, at the age of 69. While the family should be focused on remembering and honoring him, they’re also dealing with some controversy involving Vanessa Bryant. It seems that there might be some tension or perceived issues regarding her response to Joe’s passing, adding to their grief.
Joe’s relationship with Vanessa has always been a sensitive topic. Despite his parents’ initial disapproval, Kobe chose to marry Vanessa. Joe’s death, following a recent stroke, has been confirmed by L. Salman’s basketball on X, which stated: “We are deeply saddened to announce the passing of basketball great Joe Bryant. Joe played for the Explorers from 1973 to 1975 and was part of our coaching staff from 1993 to 1996. He was a beloved member of the Explorer family and will be greatly missed.”
This loss comes more than four years after the devastating helicopter crash that claimed the lives of Joe’s son Kobe and granddaughter Gigi. The crash, which happened in January 2020 in Calabasas, California, occurred while they were heading to a basketball tournament and has left a lasting impact on the Bryant family and their fans.
Joe Bryant is fondly remembered for his basketball career, both as a player and coach, in the U.S. and around the world. He made a mark at LEL, averaging 20.8 points per game over two seasons with the Explorers. In 1975, he was drafted in the first round by the Golden State Warriors but was soon traded to the Philadelphia 76ers.
Even if the specifics of his career might not be widely known, it’s clear that Jellybean Bryant had an impressive grasp of the game. The outpouring of tributes speaks volumes about his lasting impact. The Sixers summed it up well: “Joe Jellybean Bryant was a local basketball icon, with a legacy that spanned from Bartram High School to LAL University and his first four NBA seasons with the 76ers from 1975 to 1979. Our thoughts are with the Bryant family.”
One of Joe’s proudest moments was seeing his son Kobe not just follow in his footsteps but surpass him in the sport. Although their relationship had its ups and downs, especially as Kobe began his legendary career with the Los Angeles Lakers, both father and son left a lasting legacy in basketball.
The fallout between Kobe Bryant and his parents stemmed from a mix of money troubles and personal issues. In a 2016 ESPN interview, Kobe shared that he hadn’t spoken to his parents in three years after they auctioned off some of his memorabilia without asking him first. He was clearly upset, saying, “Our relationship is [expletive]. I try to buy them a nice house, and they say it’s not enough. Then they sell my stuff.” After the public outcry, Kobe’s parents apologized, saying they regretted their actions and any hurt they caused, while also acknowledging the support Kobe had given them.
Despite the apology, Kobe was still deeply hurt and couldn’t understand why his parents would act this way. He was particularly proud of his sisters, Sharia and Shia, who had learned to be independent and manage their own lives without resenting him. He admired their ability to stand on their own, saying, “They’re smart, college-educated women. I’m really proud of them. They got their own jobs and took care of themselves. It was tough for me to set these boundaries, but it’s something you have to be strong about.”
Another major issue was his parents’ disapproval of his relationship with Vanessa. They thought Kobe was too young when he got engaged to Vanessa shortly after her 18th birthday, and they felt their six-month courtship was too rushed. Their disapproval was so strong that Joe and Pam Bryant didn’t even attend Kobe and Vanessa’s wedding.
The issues with Kobe Bryant’s marriage to Vanessa went beyond just their age difference. Kobe’s parents reportedly had concerns because they wanted him to marry an African-American woman, while Vanessa is Latina. They were also critical of the fact that Vanessa hadn’t finished college, which they saw as a lack of ambition and stability. Additionally, there were rumors that Vanessa was controlling and tried to cut Kobe off from his family, which only added to the tension.
On top of that, Vanessa’s stepfather stirred up controversy in 2011 when Vanessa filed for divorce after allegations of infidelity. He accused her of being a gold digger and claimed that she was just waiting to hit the ten-year mark to secure a long-term alimony deal, similar to what her mother had done. He even mentioned that he was paying Vanessa’s mom $1,800 a month, suggesting that they didn’t really need the money.
It’s hard to say if Kobe’s parents saw Vanessa as a gold digger, but it’s clear that the situation took a toll on him. During the 2001 NBA Finals, where the Lakers faced the Philadelphia 76ers—Kobe’s hometown team—his parents didn’t come to any of the games because they weren’t speaking to him at the time. This is why there’s that famous image of Kobe sitting alone in the shower with his championship trophy, looking devastated.
A lot of the relationship dynamics were explored in the book The Rise: Kobe Bryant and the Pursuit of Immortality, which came out two years after Kobe’s death. Jeremy Treatman, a former assistant coach of Kobe’s from his Lower Merion days, shared an interesting observation from the burial ceremony: Vanessa spoke about Gigi almost as much as she did about Kobe. Oddly, there was no mention of Kobe’s high school days or his parents. Treatman also noticed that there was still noticeable tension between Vanessa and Kobe’s parents—they didn’t interact or even glance at each other throughout the ceremony.
This background sheds some light on Vanessa’s reaction to Joe Bryant’s passing. On her Instagram story, she posted: “Sending our condolences upon hearing the news of my father-in-law’s passing. We hoped things would have been different. Although the times we spent together were few, he was always sweet and nice to be around. Kobe loved him very much.”
The public nature of this message didn’t go unnoticed, and many people saw it as revealing some underlying issues. Some criticized the post for airing family grievances, with one comment reading: “Didn’t have to say all that. Should have kept it short but sweet. But of course, let’s inform everyone we had issues and that I’m still bitter. But hey, your son loved you. No class at all.” Another person said: “Timing is bad for bringing up personal family differences. No need to insert internal issues into a message of condolences. Bad move and probably made Kobe’s grieving mother even more upset.”
On the other hand, some people think Vanessa handled the situation as best as she could. One person put it this way: “I respect the honesty. Everyone knew there was tension. If she’d written a long, heartfelt message, people would have called her fake. She would’ve been criticized either way, so she kept it real, and I respect that.”
But that’s just my perspective. What do you think? Was Vanessa’s message appropriate given their history, or do you think she could have approached it differently? And what are your thoughts on their relationship still being strained after all these years?
